Today when I woke up, I knew that it’s going to be another dark morning of my life but somewhere in my heart i hoped to see a light coming through my window. It’s been few but the longest days that my mornings are eclipsed and I see nothing but darkness around. Afraid, that it might consume me sooner if I don’t do something to get rid of it. You know, those feelings which surround you, like, you know, you’re trapped between two things. Like, there is a well infront of you and a cliff behind you. You can neither step forward nor backward. You’re just stuck. That’s how I feel, confused, terrified and sometimes so numb that I can’t decide what’s right or wrong. And I see everything around so steady as well as furious.
And there are times when I try to struggle through it and there are times when I just give up, you know, like a person drowning into ocean and don’t know how to swim, he tries, struggles to save him self and when he is tired of unproductive struggle he just gives up, and let the waves take him with themselves wherever they want. I feel the same but the only difference is, that, I am a Survivor, I have been surviving through all these mad waves of ocean since so long and I have reached the shore so many times but it’s like they get me every other day to play swim or drown game all over again.